Taking Aligned Actions

This is a quick recap from May:

1 — Name what you’re holding onto
Be honest with yourself, even if it hurts. Powerful emotions don't have to be harder to release.

2 — Accept what you cannot change
Accept it gently, without resistance. Don't hold on to it; just allow it to be.

3 — Create a release ritual
Light a candle, speak your truth, and blow out the candle. Or take a bath (or a shower) and let your emotions be washed away by the water.

Find something that feels right for you.

4 — Choose yourself again
Be your priority. Choose to rest when you need to, choose self-care, choose love, choose you.

It's a good exercise and can be genuinely effective.

I also like to use visualisation.

It's not always easy, but it can be very powerful.

Here's how I would proceed:

Get into a relaxing position and close your eyes.

You can do a small breathing exercise to help you go deeper into your mind.

Now, picture your burden and think of it as a heavy weight, a boulder.

You're holding it in your hands or on your shoulders. 

Wherever it is, it's too heavy to hold.

You're trying to put it down so you can breathe, but like a magnet, it keeps coming back into your hands or onto your shoulders.

Now, you've had enough of this.

Take a deep breath and imagine filling this boulder with helium.

As it grows, put all the troubles you want to let go of inside it.

It's becoming a big balloon full of old things you don't want to carry anymore.

Imagine it attached to a string that you're holding.

It's there, floating above you.

When you're ready, take a breath and open your hand to let go of the string.

As it floats away, watch it become smaller and smaller until it disappears completely.

In your own time, take a breath and open your eyes.

I need to tell you that this isn't an easy thing to do.

Sometimes, it hurts to physically let go of what we've been holding onto for a long time.

It's okay to cry, scream, or feel empty.

Something is missing.

But the good news is...

Now you have space for something better. 🤍

First, can you tell me what a fixed mindset and a growth mindset are?

A fixed mindset is the belief that your intelligence and psychological capabilities are static and unchangeable, while a growth mindset is the belief that these abilities are changeable and can be improved through the learning process.

Now, can you recall a fixed mindset from the past month?

1. Notice your inner thoughts.

• What are they telling you?

• How gentle are your thoughts?

• Can you recognise a fixed mindset?

Sometimes we don't even realise how often we tell ourselves:

"I can't do this."

"I'm not good at this."

"I'll never be able to do it."

But noticing these thoughts is already a step forward.

2. Speak to yourself as if you were a friend.

I love this one.

Being kind to ourselves should be mandatory every day, but especially when we're developing.

When your inner thoughts become too harsh, write down the negative thought and turn it into a kinder version.

Instead of:

"I can't do this."

Try:

"I can't do this yet."

Instead of:

"I'm not good enough."

Try:

"I'm learning, and I can improve."

The goal isn't to convince yourself that everything is easy.

It's to give yourself the opportunity to learn.

3. Look at challenges differently.

When something doesn't go the way you wanted, ask yourself:

✨ What is this teaching me?
✨ What can I learn from this?
✨ How could this help me grow?

A difficult situation doesn't automatically mean you've failed.

Sometimes, it gives you information about yourself that you wouldn't have discovered otherwise.

And finally...

4. Remember that growth takes time.

You don't have to change your mindset overnight.

You don't have to get everything right.

You just need to notice, reflect, and try again.

A growth mindset isn't about believing you can do absolutely anything.

It's about believing that you can learn, improve, and develop.

So, this week, pay a little more attention to the way you speak to yourself.

Notice the fixed thoughts.

Question them.

And when you can, add one little word:

Yet. 🌿

Because "I can't" doesn't have to be the end of the sentence.

Sometimes, it's just the beginning.

Today, I’m going to share with you the resources I use when I’m coaching.

These are daily practices, but if you can’t do it everyday, that’s ok.

Just pick them up again when you can.

1. Confidence grows through consistency.

Keep 3 small promises to yourself everyday .

keep them simple, for example: 

“I’ll go for a 5 min walk everyday this week.” 

“I’ll read my book instead of doom scrolling in bed every night.” 

“I’ll eat a healthy snack instead of sweets.”

Write down your “wins” everyday on a piece of paper or in a notebook.

2. Talk to yourself as if you were talking to a friend.

Learn to shift bad thoughts.

Instead of: 

“I can’t do it.” 

Try: 

“I can’t do it yet, but I’m learning.”

Answer these questions every day in your notebook:

~ What doubt did I have today?

~ What evidence supports this thought?

~ What evidence contradicts it?

3. Confidence doesn’t come before action, it comes because of action. ( Action - Experience - Confidence.)

Everyday, do a slightly uncomfortable thing:

Do something you’ve been procrastinating. 

Tell the truth about how you feel. 

Choose something that feels slightly uncomfortable but not too hard.

Call it “My Mini Bravery Action”

Note it down in your notebook everyday.

4. Confidence increase when you recognise what you’ve overcome.

Create a “Proof-list” in your notebook and call it:

What I proved to myself today.

Write down:

🌿What you handled that day.

🌿The challenges you overcame. 

🌿The skills you used to overcome them.

5. Build a new competence.

Pick one thing and get better at it. 

It can be a new language, cooking, or any skill you’d like to develop.

Write down your new activity and how it’s going everyday in your notebook.

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If you miss a day or two, it’s ok, it happens.

Pick up where you left off and keep going,

keep learning, 

keep building your confidence.

If you need help, don’t forget that you’re not alone and I’ll be happy to give you a hand. 

Step by step, slowly but surely.🤍

The internet says:

Behavioural limits: Rules that define what is acceptable or unacceptable in relationships and social interactions.

Personal limits: Guidelines an individual sets to protect their time, energy, and emotional well-being.

I like both of these definitions. 

Rules and guidelines

Acceptable or unacceptable.

Protecting your time, energy and emotional wellbeing.

Boundaries are not that hard to set.

Although, respecting them and making sure others are too, that’s another story.

The theme for September will be: 

Boundaries & Protecting your energy.

So now, tell me;

Before September arrives, explain to me:

How do you set boundaries? 

And most importantly, how do you respect them?

Throughout September, let’s learn this altogether 💚